Hello, my name is Doctor Sasuke
by Itachi012110
Summary: A young Sasuke goes through a stage where he pretends to be a doctor-with Itachi as his patient.
1. Diagnoses

"I'm home." Itachi called once he entered the house. His mother had asked him if he could go out to the grocery store to get some milk. After the door was shut, said mother, was the first to greet him.

"Thank you Itachi, I really appreciate it." Mikoto said with a warm smile. She turned to the stair case and called up the stairs, "Sasuke! Itachi's home!" Mikoto called.

"He's been waiting very patiently for you to get home so that you can play together." Mikoto said and took the milk from Itachi. Itachi could hear tiny footsteps racing down the stairs towards him. Before knew it, a force known as Sasuke crashed into his midsection.

Itachi let out a grunt from the impact, and looked down at Sasuke. Sasuke was looking up at him with a wide smile on his face, and he felt something hard touching his back. When Itachi turned around, he saw that Sasuke had a clip board in his hands with a blue crayon.

"Itachi, you know what?" Sasuke asked.

"What?" Itachi asked with a smile.

"You're very sick, so you need to see a doctor." Sasuke said with a serious look on his face. Itachi was momentarily confused because Sasuke looked so serious, but when Sasuke held out his crayon and clip board, Itachi knew that he wanted to play doctor. "So I'm sick, am I?" Itachi asked.

"Yes you are. You're very sick Itachi, so I'm going to take care of you. Sign here." Sasuke said.

Itachi took the clip board and crayon from Sasuke, and signed, 'Itachi Uchiha', handing the clip board back to Sasuke. Mikoto giggled and walked away with the milk. "Have fun, you too, and make sure that he's better before dinner, okay Sasuke?"

"I will! Come on, patient, we need to look at you, immediately." Sasuke said, grabbing a hold of Itachi's arm and dragging him upstairs. Once upstairs, Sasuke lead Itachi to his (Sasuke's), bedroom and had him sit on Sasuke's bed.

"I need you to stay here while I get something." Sasuke said. Itachi waited patiently, and within a few minute's time, Sasuke came running back in with a bundle of black and gray cloth in his arms. "Put these on."

"What are they?" Itachi asked. Upon unfolding the clothes, he recognized it to be his clothes from his closet. "These are mine. My pajamas." Itachi said.

"I know that. Put them on, those are your hospital clothes." The four year old demanded. Itachi looked at Sasuke and gestured for him to turn around. "It's okay, Itachi, I'll close my eyes."

"Are you going to peek?" Itachi asked. "I promise I won't peek, big brother." Sasuke said, smiled, and covered up his eyes. Itachi stared at him just to make sure that he wasn't peeking, and changed his shirt, putting on a black shirt that was just a little too big for him. The last article of clothing was a pair of gray…shorts.

"Sasuke?" Itachi asked.

"Yes? Can I look now?"

"No, but I have a question."

"Okay, but hurry up before you get more sick than you already are."

"You want me to wear these shorts, but it's the middle of January. It's too cold." Itachi said.

"Too bad. Those are your hospital clothes, and you aren't planning on going outside, are you?" Sasuke asked.

"No, but—"

"No! Just put it on, so that I can see what's wrong with you." Sasuke said, raising his tone of voice a little higher for emphasis. Seeing as Sasuke was getting impatient, Itachi complied, and put on the pair of shorts, despite the goose bumps that immediately ran up his legs.

"I'm done."

"Okay. My name is Doctor Sasuke Uchiha, but you can call me Doctor Sasuke." Sasuke said.

"Doctor Sasuke, is it? Okay, then." Itachi said aloud, but mostly to himself.

Sasuke grabbed his clip board again and pretended to flip through the pages as if he was looking for something. Itachi just sat on the bed quietly, letting Sasuke take his time with what he wanted to do.

"Okay, please lie down on the bed, and we will start your examination." Sasuke said. Itachi lied down like he was told and wondered how Sasuke knew all these things about doctors. If Itachi remembered correctly, he had only been there maybe three times at most, and hated it, but now he was pretending to be one.

"Never mind, I need you to sit up so that I can look at your throat." Sasuke said. Itachi got back up using his elbows to support his weight and looked at Sasuke. "So I have a sore throat, Doctor…Sasuke?"

"No. But I need to do a checkup first so I can see what the problem is." Sasuke said. He walked over to the desk in the far corner of the room and started to rummage through his arts and crafts bin. Seconds later, he pulled out a single popsicle stick, and walked over to where Itachi sat.

"Say 'ah' big brother, I mean, patient of mine." Sasuke said.

"Ah," Itachi said and opened his mouth. He wasn't exactly comfortable with Sasuke looking down his throat, but he knew that Sasuke would get mad if he didn't do what he said. Suddenly, Sasuke decided that it would be a good idea to jab Itachi in the back of the throat, causing him to gag and start coughing.

Sasuke immediately pulled the popsicle stick out of Itachi's mouth, and rubbed slow circles on Itachi's back to get him to calm down and stop coughing. "Shh, it's okay, Itachi, shh," Sasuke said. He hoped that it was helping, because he really hadn't meant to hurt Itachi, he just stuck the popsicle stick a little too far. He couldn't help it though, because he couldn't see anything. Right now, he was doing his best to copy his mother's movements whenever one of the two brothers went into a coughing fit.

Eventually, Itachi stopped coughing and relaxed, but was still breathing deeply. "Are you okay, Itachi?" Sasuke asked. Itachi nodded. "Just be more careful next time, okay?" Itachi asked.

"Now I need to check your reflexes." Sasuke said and pulled out a miniature hammer from an array of plastic tool box toys that he got for Christmas last month.

Very gently, Sasuke tapped Itachi's right knee cap and then switched to the left. It took him a couple of tries until there was a tiny bit of movement. Itachi decided not to tell Sasuke though, because Sasuke wouldn't accept that, and it was really too small for it to count. Then on the next hit, Itachi figured that Sasuke definitely did it that time. However, Sasuke must have missed it as he kept going.

"Sasuke, I felt something that time, didn't you feel it?"

"Hm-hm!"

"I'm sorry, Doctor Sasuke, but—"

Sasuke cut him off. "You're the patient, and I'm the Doctor, so you need to be quiet while I work."

Itachi immediately mumbled a quiet apology and kept his mouth shut for now. Sasuke, on the other hand, was getting impatient that he couldn't see Itachi's leg move, so he struck it as hard as he could, earning a yelp from Itachi, who hugged his now aching leg.

"You're reflexes are good, Itachi. Now I need to check your blood." Sasuke said and seemed to be deciding on which arm he wanted to use. "Give me this arm, and we'll start." Sasuke said. Itachi let Sasuke take his arm in his much smaller hands. Sasuke squeezed it with his hands a few times, even though he could barely connect both of his hands around Itachi's bicep, and did that for a minute. When he stopped, there were two, pink hand prints of Sasuke's on Itachi's upper arm.

"Hm, interesting. I'll be back with your blood test. I need to go talk to the nurse about something." Sasuke said and left the room. He quickly poked his head back in and said. "Stay right there and don't move, Itachi. I mean it too." Sasuke said. Itachi chuckled and waited patiently for Sasuke to get back.

"Mom, you're the nurse now."

"Oh really? So, how's your patient? Are you taking good care of him for mommy?" Mikoto asked as she bent down to Sasuke's height.

"Not really, but yeah, he's being good." Sasuke said.

"Well tell him that he needs to be good for you, because you're the Doctor, and you're taking care of him."

"Yeah. Mom, do we have any food coloring?" Sasuke asked.

"Hm," Mikoto thought for a second and started to look through the cabinets above the sink. "Here's some, what do you need food coloring for, Doctor Sasuke?" Mikoto asked and giggled.

"I need it for Itachi's blood tests. He's waiting patiently for the results." Sasuke said.

"Oh? And how did you take his blood?"

"Huh?"

"I said, how did you take his blood?"

"I used a pump."

"I think you measured it, sweet heart. Here, do you want some help from nurse mommy?" She asked.

Sasuke shook his head up and down. "Yes, please. Come on, he's waiting." Sasuke said, tugging on Mikoto's apron that she always seems to wear 24/7. "Hold on, Doctor Sasuke, I'm getting some things for Itachi's blood test. I assume that you want red food coloring?" Mikoto asked.

"Sometimes, blood is blue and purple." Sasuke said in a matter of factly tone.

"Then I'll bring up blue and red. We don't have purple, but blue and red should make purple." Mikoto said. She was carrying up two food coloring droppers, a cup, a straw, and a role of tape while Sasuke lead the way.

Itachi was surprised to see Mikoto walk in with Sasuke, and then remembered Sasuke saying something about talking to the nurse. He would've never thought that his mother would be the nurse.

"Sasuke, can you hold the cup while I get the patient ready for his test?"

"T-test?" Itachi gulped. "What test?"

"The doctor only measured your blood, Itachi, we need an actual sample." Mikoto said. Suddenly, Itachi wondered if they were actually going to take his blood, but Mikoto winked at him, which meant that they would only pretend to. He was still nervous though, because they were preparing something over there.

Walking over to where Itachi was, Mikoto sat on the edge of the bed and taped the straw to Itachi's forearm. "Doctor Sasuke, can you bring the cup over here?" Mikoto asked. Sasuke did as he was told and walked over to where Mikoto was. She instructed him to put the cup under the end of the straw while she dropped food coloring down the straw. First she used red, and then switched to blue.

Itachi marveled how Mikoto went about this. It was actually very creative to copy the tubes that one would hook up to your veins and use food coloring to mimic blood and put it in a plastic cup for a sample.

When Mikoto stopped, her and Sasuke walked over to Sasuke's desk where he had laid the clip board earlier. Sasuke came back a minute later and Itachi asked. "So, Doctor, what are the results?" Itachi asked.

"Bad." Sasuke said.

"Why?" Itachi asked.

"It's supposed to be purple, not dark red. Your blood is very _poor_, Itachi." Sasuke said and put the paper down.

"I'm going back downstairs Sasuke, if you need me, just come and get me in the kitchen." Mikoto said and walked out. Sasuke placed his hands on Itachi's forearm, ever so delicately and told him. "This might hurt, Itachi, so you can hold my hand if you want." Sasuke said and held onto Itachi's palm. He slowly peeled the 'tube' or straw off of Itachi's arm and tossed it in the waste basket. After that, he reached into his box of stuff and pulled out a plain bandage, placing it where the tape previously was.

"There you go." Sasuke said.

Itachi looked down at the bandage, then up at Sasuke and smiled. "Thank you, it feels so much better." Itachi said.

Sasuke smiled, impressed with his work. "Okay, I need to test your sight and hearing, Itachi." Sasuke said. "I don't have a flashlight though. The Nurse doesn't want me to use a flashlight on your eyes." Sasuke said and rummaged through his box again.

"That's why I'm using a fake one." Sasuke said and pointed the plastic, yellow flashlight at Itachi's face. "I'm going to check this one first."

"Okay," Itachi said and waited for Sasuke to continue. Very gently, Sasuke touched Itachi's eyelid and pulled away. "Am I hurting you, Itachi?" Sasuke asked innocently. He knew that Itachi's eyes bothered him every now and then, and his mother warned him to be careful when touching them.

"Yeah." Itachi said. "I'm okay, Sasuke, just please be careful." Itachi warned him.

Sasuke nodded and gently pulled Itachi's bottom eyelid down slightly. He looked at Itachi's eye until Itachi pulled away. Then he did the same thing with the other eye, but more gentle this time so that he didn't hurt Itachi.

"Did I hurt you, Itachi?" Sasuke asked.

Itachi felt bad for him, because he only wanted to pretend to be a doctor, but at the same time, Itachi's eyes were more sensitive than most people's. It was hard for the real doctor and the eye doctor to check his eyes. "No, you didn't hurt me, Sasuke." Itachi said. It was good that he answered Sasuke, because Sasuke looked like he would cry if he hurt Itachi.

"Now I need to check your ears." Sasuke said. He pointed his plastic flashlight at Itachi's left ear, then his right. "You don't have any infections." Sasuke said and wrote something down in his clipboard. When he came back, he held up a magnet.

"What are you going to do now?" Itachi asked.

"Lift your shirt up." Sasuke said.

"Um…why?" Itachi asked. He wasn't really comfortable showing his chest to Sasuke. Before he could say no, Sasuke put the magnet under Itachi's shirt, without lifting it, and touched it to the middle of his chest.

"That's cold, what are you doing?" Itachi asked. He was getting goose bumps now because the magnet was so cold. Removing the magnet now, Sasuke placed his ear on Itachi's chest. Itachi immediately realized that Sasuke was using the magnet as a stethoscope, and listening to his heart.

"Good news, your heart's doing fine, even though your blood is still poor. You'll have to come back in a few weeks time to get that checked by a specialist." Sasuke said.

Itachi nodded, a little unsure how Sasuke knew all of this stuff.

"Now that the check-up is done, I need to see what's wrong with you." Sasuke said and went back to dig around in his arts and crafts drawer.

"What were you doing earlier? You said that you were already trying to see what was wrong with me." Itachi complained. Here he was, thinking that Sasuke was going to heal him, but he was actually checking on his health? He could have slowly been dying, and not have realized it.

"I was checking to see how healthy you are." Sasuke said and pulled out a single piece of black construction paper and a crayon.

"Lie down, Itachi." Sasuke said. Itachi apparently didn't lie down fast enough, because Sasuke started to push on his chest so that he would lie down like he was told to. Sasuke suddenly lifted up his shirt, and placed the construction paper on top. Then, he started to draw.

Itachi just watched as best as he could, until Sasuke told him to lie down and that he would hurt his neck. Minutes later, Sasuke finished and held it up for Itachi to see.

"These are your X-rays."

"Okay…" Itachi said, not knowing what Sasuke was going to do to him. "So, what's wrong with me? Do I have a broken rib or something?" Itachi asked.

"No."

"No?"

"We need to remove your stomach right away." Itachi's jaw dropped. "Excuse me?" Itachi asked.

"I need to remove your stomach. See?" Sasuke pointed to a sloppy diagram of Itachi's rib cage. "That's my heart, Sasuke, I mean, Doctor Sasuke."

Sasuke shook his head. "No it's not, your stomach moved to where your heart was, so that's why your blood is bad. Then it moved down here to your hips. It isn't in the right spot, so we have to take it out and put it there." Sasuke said.

Itachi was blown away. He didn't know what to say.

"We'll start the surgery once I'm done talking to the nurse." Sasuke said and left the room.


	2. Surgery

**Author's Note:** I'm so surprised to see how many of you think that this was the end of the story. Just wait until you read the first sentence...anyways, I loved how many people reviewed in the time I was watching a movie. Wow. Well, let's sum this up shall we? I hope you enjoy this next and final chapter as much as you did the first one. L.o.L-smiley face.

* * *

><p>Itachi's mind was spinning in circles along with the rest of the world. Literally. Sasuke had him spin around for five minutes and now the world wouldn't stop spinning. He just wanted it to stop. Apparently, it was Sasuke's way of putting him under what Sasuke referred to as 'anesthetics', and it worked. He wouldn't move even if somebody paid him to.<p>

"I'm going to start the surgery now, Itachi." Sasuke said in a blurry voice. Itachi could barely hear him, because his head was spinning and he felt like he was going to vomit any minute now. He had to give Sasuke credit though, because he felt like somebody knocked him out and he was slowly losing consciousness.

Meanwhile, Sasuke went over to his box of things and pulled out three bandages and a red Magic Marker. He walked over to where Itachi was lying and pulled his shirt up. Then he proceeded with the surgery. First, he made a small cut where Itachi's heart was, then a cut under Itachi's belly button, and the last one under Itachi's ribs. After the surgery was done, he had to cover up the marks with the band-aids.

Slowly, everything in Sasuke's room came back into focus, and Itachi rubbed his temples. If Sasuke wasn't so cute, Itachi would kill him for making him spin like he had done earlier.

"Doctor Sasuke, am I allowed to move? Is the operation over?" Itachi asked in a drowsy tone of voice.

"That's not a good idea, because the medication hasn't worn off yet." Sasuke said.

Itachi sat up anyways, but the world started to spin again and Itachi let his body fall back down to the bed. "Ughh…" Itachi moaned.

"I told you. That's what you get for not listening Itachi." Sasuke said.

He waited quietly for Itachi's response. "…sorry…" Itachi whispered. Sasuke walked over to the bed and said, "The operation's over, but you still need to recover. Take a nap for a little bit."

Itachi would've protested, but Sasuke covered him up with his big, comforter, and Itachi hadn't gotten much sleep last night…so…he decided that a nap might be a good idea….

Sasuke walked over to the radio, and turned it on. It came out fuzzy, but that always put Sasuke to sleep. Silently, since Itachi wasn't looking, Sasuke tip toed out of the room and shut the door. Just as he peeked in, he saw Itachi turn over on his side and get comfy.

On the other hand, Itachi couldn't see why Sasuke put it on a fuzzy station. He would've told him, but for some reason, he didn't. It did become a bit more soothing though, and helped make everything stop spinning for once.

"How did the operation go, Doctor Sasuke?" Mikoto asked Sasuke when he came downstairs.

"Good. The patient is recovering right now."

"Okay."

Everything was silent for a moment. "Mom, I mean-Nurse?"

"Yes, Doctor Sasuke?" Mikoto asked him in her sweet motherly tone of voice.

"I need some stuff."

"Like what?" Mikoto asked.

Sasuke thought for a moment before saying. "Itachi needs some medicine for his recovery." Sasuke said.

"What kind should we give him? Cranberry juice or grape juice?" Mikoto asked.

"Medicine is icky, and so is cranberry, so we should give him cranberry juice." Sasuke said.

"Okay, Doctor." Mikoto said and got out a plastic cup from the cupboard, filling it up with red liquid. When it was completely filled up, she handed it to Sasuke. "Anything else?"

"Itachi was a good patient, so he needs a lollipop." Sasuke said. Mikoto placed both on the table, and Sasuke picked them up. "How about I help you bring them up so that you don't spill them?" Mikoto asked.

"Okay, but don't wake him up, I'm not ready." Sasuke said and gave Mikoto the cup of medicine.

"I won't." Mikoto promised and smiled.

When they both got upstairs, Sasuke set the lollipop on the table, and walked over to where Itachi was lying on his back. Mikoto set the cup on the table and watched as Sasuke lay his head on Itachi's chest.

"Don't go downstairs yet, Nurse, because I need to check his heart beat again." Sasuke said and walked over to his desk, pulling out a blank piece of white paper. He started to scribble a bunch of zig-zag lines indicating Itachi's heart rate and showed them to Mikoto.

"Oh my…is that his heart rate?" Mikoto asked, thinking that it was supposed to look more…steady than that.

"Yes it is." Sasuke said.

Downstairs, Sasuke and Itachi's father, Fugaku arrived home from work and looked around. It was odd because nobody was around at the moment. Normally, he would heard the sound of running water and dishes from the kitchen, meaning that Mikoto was there. Also, Sasuke normally greeted him whenever he got home with a wide smile on his four year old face. Itachi, well, it was normal for him to be no where in sight because that was the way he always was. So, going by the chance that Itachi was still upstairs, he went up to ask where his wife and other son where. When he looked into Itachi's room though, he wasn't there. There was however, noise coming from Sasuke's room, so he decided to check there.

"Mikoto? Are you there?" Fugaku asked and knocked on the door. Nobody answered, so he opened it.

"Hi, honey, how was work?" Mikoto asked.

Fugaku just stared. Itachi was lying in Sasuke's bed, fast asleep, Sasuke was looking through a box of toys, and Mikoto was holding a cup of red juice. "Fine, but what in the world is going on here?" Fugaku asked.

"Dad, you need to leave, the patient is recovering." Sasuke said in a serious tone.

"Patient? What patient?" Fugaku asked.

"Itachi got surgery on his stomach. See?" Sasuke told him and help up the chart with Itachi's heart rate.

Fugaku was about to start yelling and asking questions as to when this happened, but Mikoto mouthed 'he's just pretending, dear. Itachi's fine.' It was a good thing after all these years, that Fugaku knew how to read her lips.

"Now go, the sign outside says no visitors, and you're going to wake the patient up." Sasuke said, trying to push Fugaku out of the way.

"Sign? What sign? I didn't see a sign!"

Sasuke pointed to a piece of paper taped to the door which had squiggly lines and a bunch of scribbles on it. Fugaku didn't understand how he was supposed to read it when it was impossible. "You can visit later when the sign says so." Sasuke said.

Sasuke closed the door, leaving Fugaku alone in the hallway.

"Itachi, wake up and take your medicine." Sasuke said and handed Itachi the cup with the cranberry juice in it. He had been nice and had given Itachi an hour to take a nap.

Itachi sat up a little in bed and took the cup. "What…um…is this stuff?"

"It's just juice, Itachi, now take it."

Without another word, Itachi drank it and cringed. He didn't particularly like cranberry juice, so it made sense that it was the medicine.

As soon as he was done, Sasuke shoved something banana flavored into his mouth. He then realized it to be a lollipop and said, "Thank ou, Dohctor Sathkay." Itachi tried to say with a lollipop in his mouth. He almost spit it out though, when Sasuke showed him his heart rate. Then he remembered that Sasuke was just four and pretending.

"Itachi, I have bad news and good news." Sasuke said.

Itachi took the lollipop out of his mouth so that he could speak properly. "What's the bad news?" Itachi asked.

"I'm not a real doctor."

Itachi raised his eyebrows jokingly. "Really? What's the good news?"

"I had a good time taking care of you." Sasuke said and gave Itachi a hug.

"Is he still alive, Doctor Sasuke?" Mikoto asked, suddenly appearing at the door. "Yeah." Sasuke said.

"If that's the case, then you can have your lollipop then." Mikoto said. Sasuke shook his head. "Oh?" Mikoto asked.

"I don't like sweets." Sasuke said. Mikoto giggled and left the room. "Alright then. Dinner's ready you two, and I'm sure Itachi's hungry after his surgery."

On the way down, Itachi was curious about something and asked Sasuke about it. "Sasuke?" Itachi asked.

"Yeah?"

"How did you learn about all of those…" He didn't want to say procedures, because Sasuke was only four and wouldn't understand. "…things, about doctors and what they do?"

Sasuke smiled, shrugged, and said, "It's simple. I stay up late and watch that doctor show that you watch in my room every Sunday night." Sasuke said. "Don't tell mommy, it's a secret." He said and ran downstairs, leaving Itachi shocked at the top of the stairs. His four year old brother stayed up until eleven to watch a show that was probably rated PG-13 about…doctors. Then again, Itachi watched it, and he was only nine years old. Sasuke's secret was safe with him.

**-Epilogue-**

About a week after Itachi's 'surgery', Itachi became sick with the flu. Sasuke offered to take care of him again, but since he was actually sick this time, Mikoto offered to take care of him this time around, giving Sasuke a break.


End file.
